Crash and Burrn
by esompthin
Summary: When Alexander invites Aaron to go drinking, things don't go as expected. In which Burr gets smashed and I just wanted to write puns using his name. Crack-ish.


"What would happen if- if I killed you?" Aaron said, slinging an arm around Alex's shoulder.

Alexander gave him a mildly amused look as he replied, "Uh, I'd be dead?"

"It'd be _Burr_ der!" Aaron burst out into giggles at his own joke. The group around them laughed, not at the pun, but at how utterly shitfaced Aaron had become. No one was expecting this, when they asked Burr if he wanted to join them for drinks. But it appeared as though Aaron had the intention to drink his night away, because he agreed quickly.

Hercules was recording everything, because, "This kind of blackmail only comes once in a lifetime."

It wasn't like Aaron was a lightweight either. As soon as they sat down he started off with shots and he hasn't stopped since.

They were in a small bar near the office; it wasn't too busy, but it wasn't empty either. There were some nice pool tables in the corner and loud music playing from hidden speakers. Alexander and his friends were surrounded around a circular table near the corner. Everyone was pleasantly buzzed, except for Burr, who appeared to be a very jovial drunk.

"I need more liquBurr!" Aaron said when he looked down at his empty shot glass, a small pout on his lips. The expression broke immediately into more giggles.

"No," Hamilton said, but John was quick to interrupt.

"Of course! More shots for everyone!" John jumped up and stumbled to the bar before Alexander could protest.

Lafayette nudged him, "You have to relax, monsieur! Follow Burr's lead!"

Alex watched as the Frenchman downed his drink just in time for John to come back with another round. They toasted and threw back their shots. Hercules laughed at them, reaching across the table for his own drink.

Aaron grinned, "Is that Burr me?"

Alexander sighed and passed him the drink, "You really should slow down, though. You're really intoxicated."

"I can- I can do it with your name too!" Burr said, completely ignoring Alex's request. He threw back his shot, his face contorting at the burn of the alcohol, "If we had a kid, it would be named AlexandBurr!"

Alex's face grew red as Burr leaned on him, snorting at his joke. John shot him a knowing grin. The boys were well aware of his crush on the serious man. Seeing him this openly affectionate was rattling his brain. Maybe he should have another shot. He quickly downed his drink.

"When, when I write things…" Aaron said, already laughing to himself. It took him a moment to get the rest of the joke out, and that only made the other men around him laugh. "It's literatBurr!"

Alex couldn't help the small snort that came out of his mouth at that one. "That one wasn't too bad."

Burr's face lit up, excited that he got Alex's praise. "I got more! Let me think, hold on, hold on."

He thought, licking his lips as he stared at the table before him. He kept giggling, which lost his train of thought, and then he had to start over, clearing his throat. The entire thing was adorable.

"You're John Burrens." Aaron pointed to John. Then to Laf, "You're GilBurrt Lafayette."

Herc was cackling, "Oh my god, he's practically falling down drunk."

"The only falling I am-" Burr hiccuped, leaning heavily on Alexander. "Is falling for you."

Alex's face grew red as he groaned, "Please stop."

"I'm just tellin' the booth. The truth." Burr smiled at Alex, a drunken blush on his cheeks. "I've been falling for you for years. You're so hot. You're, like, Burrfect for me."

John was grinning ear to ear as he prodded the drunk man, "What are you trying to say, Aaron?"

"Pssh," The sound was mostly just spit, "I'm sayin' I'm in love with Hamilton. Aren't you paying atten-attention, Burrens?"

The men around the table were giggling, laughing, really, as they watched the drunk man shamelessly cling to a bright-red Alexander. Hamilton tried to ignore them, but it was truly difficult. He licked his lips as the world turned a bit mute at Burr's words. He watched the other man with barely held back want.

"You're in love with me?" Alex asked, breathless. He watched as a sheepish smile spread across Aaron's lips.

"Burrprise?" Aaron said, grinning ear to ear. Alex looked over to his friends, who were watching with various levels of amused shock. Hercules was still filming and Alex grew red at the realization.

"Fuck, Herc, turn that shit off!" He hissed, waving his hand in front of the phone.

"More like, Burrcules!" Aaron laughed, completely unaware of everyone else's emotions.

* * *

Aaron doesn't know how he got home last night. Which is _not_ promising. From the second he woke up, he felt like Death reborn. The world still swayed when he moved too fast, making him dizzy. Whoever brought him home left him advil and water by his bed, which he silently thanked.

There was an intense pounding behind his eyes, and it made him want to cry. After a painful vomiting session, he crawled into his shower. Aaron sat there for an hour - quite possibly longer - until he felt like he could stand again.

It was only after he sat down on his couch, a water bottle in one hand and his phone in the other, did he finally decided he needed to think. Which he really didn't want to do, because it hurt to think.

What did he remember?

He was heading out for the night, closing his office door and turning off the lights. Aaron was expecting a quiet Friday night inside, with a book and a warm bath. That plan was thrown out the window and jumped on when Alexander Hamilton came running up to him.

His eyes were bright and excited, a slight flush to his cheeks. He was downright adorable, as he asked Burr if he wanted to join him and his friends for drinks.

Aaron hesitated. A book was calling his name; but he so rarely gets to spend time with the other man. Burr didn't have a lot of friends, and this was one he wanted to keep close. _And bring closer_ , if he could manage it.

Alex pleaded, poking his lower lip out. Aaron could never say no to that face, so he nodded in agreement. He fought down his blush when Alex hugged him in excitement, pulling him along by his hand to the exit. He was talking a mile a minute, but all Aaron could focus on was the warmth of his hand.

When they got to the bar, Aaron was about to die from Alex's overall cuteness. Watching the other man interact with his friends was too much for his heart to handle. He figured the only way he was going to make it through the night was if he was drunk.

The group of men cheered when he said the first round would be on him.

That's all he remembered.

He groaned as he sat back on his couch, his brain exhausted just from recalling that much. He wished he knew if he did something stupid or irredeemable. He was known to go a bit overboard when drunk and he didn't want Alexander to think poorly of him.

As if hearing his thoughts, his phone lit up with a notification. It was a message from Hercules Mulligan, whose name was strangely changed to 'Burr-cules'.

The message was just a winky face and a video. Burr took a long swig of water before he clicked play, preparing himself for the worst.

"What would happen if - if I killed you?"

"Uh, I'd be dead?" Aaron smiled softly at Alex's response.

"It'd be _Burr_ der!" Aaron's smile fell at his own antics.

As the video continued on, Aaron sunk deeper and deeper into the couch, groaning and hiding his face in his hand. He didn't want to watch this. But he couldn't look away from it. His face was bright red by the time it got to the _really_ bad part.

"...You're in love with me?"

"Burrprise?"

"Fuck, Herc, turn that shit off!" Alexander practically _growled_. He sounded so pissed off, so angry and upset at finding out about Burr's feelings.

"More like Burrcules!"

The video cut off then, the frame frozen on Alexander's furious expression. Shame and pain filled Burr's chest as he stared at the image. He had drunkenly confessed his love for the immigrant. And he didn't react the way Burr was hoping he would.

Well.

Fuck.

Aaron wanted to sit there and mope for a long time. Perhaps he could do some kind of damage control; convince Alexander that it was all just alcohol talking. It would hurt, surely, but it would be better than seeing the angry, disgusted look in Alexander's eyes. Burr wished he could sit on his couch and wallow in shame for the next year or so.

But his doorbell rang. And kept ringing.

* * *

The door opened after a moment. Burr glared at him, squinting at the sunlight. He scowled, swaying slightly on his feet. The man looked like a complete and utter wreck. Alexander has never seen him so distraught.

"Alexander?"

Hamilton wrung his hands, bouncing on his feet with nervous energy, "Can we confer, sir?"

"It's - fuck, the middle of the night?"

"It's ten in the morning, Burr." A smile almost graced Alex's lips at the response.

"Sweet Jesus." Aaron ran a hand over his face, rubbing his eyes. A small groan escaped his lips and Hamilton felt a tang of pity for the other man. "Fine, sure. Come in."

He stepped aside as Alexander entered the house. "I wanted to talk about last night."

"Never mind, get out." Aaron automatically griped. The reaction made Alexander smile.

The smile fell, though, as he remembered the topic of discussion. He licked his lips and looked away, "How much do you remember?"

Aaron paused for a second, watching him, "Nothing."

"Oh."

"But Mulligan sent me a video..."

" _Oh._ "

Aaron sighed and picked up a half-full water bottle. He took a swig, carefully avoiding eye contact.

"So," Alex said, fishing for how to begin. "I didn't know you were such a big fan of puns."

Burr shook his head, "Cut to the chase, Alexander."

"Right. Um." Hamilton ran a hand through his hair, a slight blush pulling at his cheeks. "I was just… wondering, I guess. If, well, if anything you said last night was true."

Burr thought for a moment, pursing his lips. Even with a killer headache, he was able to examine the atmosphere. Alexander appeared nervous; far more so than Burr had ever seen him before. Hamilton rarely gets nervous so, logically, Burr's answer must truly mean a lot to him. It can be assumed that if he _didn't_ care about Burr's answer, he wouldn't reciprocate his feelings.

If Burr told the truth, there's a slight chance Alexander would be pleased.

However, Alexander appeared more than a little upset with Aaron's drunken confession last night. This could be for a number of reasons. He could have been embarrassed that it was in front of his friends. He could not want or appreciate the attention. He could have been upset that Aaron could only tell him while inebriated. Or, knowing Hamilton, he was simply mad that he didn't get to say it first.

There were too many variables. Things were too rocky. Burr couldn't make a distinctive, safe decision just yet. He'd have to wait for the right opportunity.

"You brought me home last night." Burr stated. It wasn't a question, Aaron was imply making an educated guess. Lafayette or Hercules wouldn't bother to do it. And John, while nice, didn't seem too sympathetic in the video. Alexander was also the most mature individual last night, which was quite a feat in and of itself.

Alex was surprised by the topic change. He nodded once, "Yes."

"You set out the water and advil." Burr took another sip of water.

"Yes."

Aaron smiled kindly, "Thank you."

A small blush spread across Hamilton's cheeks at the sight of the smile. It was soft and warm; pure and thankful. Alex tried to control the pounding of his heart, "O-of course."

"I wasn't too much trouble, I hope." Aaron said, "I have no recollection of when we got home."

To Burr's pleasant surprise, the blush only grew darker as Alex thought of a few whispered phrases and not-too-subtle touches. "Uh- yeah, no, you were- fine. It's fine."

Interesting.

Aaron pulled a face, "I didn't make any more puns, did I?"

"No. No, you were… punned out by the time we got home." Alex shuffled his feet. "So, um, about what you said-"

Burr turned towards his kitchen, "I haven't had breakfast yet. Would you like something?"

"Uh- no, I'm okay." Aaron could hear Alex's soft footsteps behind him as he walked to the kitchen. He quietly poured himself some coffee and then made Alexander a cup as well, knowing how much the man loved caffeine. Alex smiled gratefully.

"I apologize for my behavior last night." Aaron commented after a sip. "I'm not usually much of a drinker."

"Yeah, I was… surprised." Alex said. He added quietly, "By a lot of it."

Aaron watched as the man threw back large gulps of coffee, clearly trying to express some form of normalcy. "Do you and your friends go drinking every weekend? They seem to get very into it."

Alex set his mostly-empty coffee mug down with a sharp _clink_. "Burr."

"Sir."

"Stop avoiding my question."

"I don't seem to recall it."  
"Bullshit."

Burr let out a soft sigh. He supposed he'd have to make a decision now. The small immigrant had invaded his space, crossing his arms, glaring up at him. Burr admired the sight of the man. He really was beautiful.

"Yes."

Alex raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"Yes." Burr calmly took another drink of coffee, ignoring the rushing of blood in his ears.

"What do you-"

"I meant what I said last night." Burr stated, ripping it off like a band-aid. "I am in love with you, Alexander Hamilton."

Alex's eyes widened and his face rapidly darkened into a dark pink. "W-wait, really? Like, Burr, real?"

Aaron snorted, "Yes, Burr real."

"I didn't mean to do that." The blush grew darker, but Alexander was smiling. He leaned up on his tippy toes and pressed a chaste kiss to the corner of Aaron's mouth. Burr couldn't stop the grin spreading across his lips.

Very carefully, he set his coffee cup down. And very carefully, he began to ravishly make out with the blushing immigrant.

The video was saved on his phone. Sometimes he played it just to see Alexander's bright red blush. Sometimes Alex played it just to watch Burr squirm at the stupid puns. And if the video was played at their wedding, one could only blame Hercules for filming it in the first place.

And maybe it was because Hamilton hates Burr, or maybe because he loves to make Aaron blush, but the man made sure that the priest at the wedding said these words exactly.

"And do you, Aaron Burr take Alexander Hamilton to be your lawfully wedded husband," A slight pause, "Burr better or Burr worse?"

You can't blame him for laughing too hard to say, "I do.", but he thinks he got his point across by how excitedly he kissed his new husband.

* * *

Tell me what you think!


End file.
